Old Guo is currently at the peak of his creative powers, unlike later years when most of his work was just phoning it in. He even gave it a nice name: "Use seven-tenths of your ability, leave three-tenths for your children and grandchildren." Just like many authors who pull the "golden three chapters" trick—hooking readers at the start, then getting lazier and lazier, padding the content like Fahai flooding Golden Mountain.
He bought front-row tickets and took Sun Li along. The Tianqiao Small Theater wasn't crowded, so the sound was clear and the view was sharp. Their seats were in the second row, right in the middle, no need to sit sideways—a VIP spot with an excellent viewing angle. After finding their seats, they ordered a combo: melon seeds, drinks, raw peanuts, tea, and juice all laid out on the table.
The show began with Young Master Hou announcing the acts. Zhou You wanted to see who would open. Shao Bing came out in his long gown—ugly as ever. At least he got fit later, but now he had a pockmarked face, buck teeth sticking out, and a booming voice. During performances, he got excited way too easily, and before you knew it, spit was flying everywhere. Zhou You silently thanked his lucky stars more than once that they weren't in the first row, or he wouldn't even be able to drink his tea.
After the warm-up, a bunch of people came out one after another. Zhou You recognized some, but not others. Zhang Helun showed up in the middle—classic "Xiao Bai," so filthy even he couldn't rein himself in. Zhou You glanced around and saw people had brought kids too. Talk about carefree, really thinking this was suitable for all ages. Once the pace picked up, nothing could stop it—not even foreign brake pads.
Finally, Old Guo and Teacher Yu came out. The other相声 acts weren't bad—pretty funny, actually, especially live, with a much richer atmosphere—but they just didn't have Old Guo's pull. Their skill level was also a notch lower, not worth listening to on repeat.
The two took the stage, bowed once, and the crowd cheered. Old Guo said, "Since you're all so supportive, I'll bow again to liven things up." He bowed once more. Yu Qian stood there motionless. Old Guo asked, "Why aren't you bowing along?" Yu Qian replied, "My back hurts." Old Guo said, "Then I'll bow for you!" He started to bend over. Yu Qian quickly stopped him: "You're asking for trouble." Old Guo looked up sideways: "What's wrong? Your back hurts, I bow for you, and you're still not grateful?" Yu Qian pushed Old Guo: "That's the third one! Who does that?"
Good grief, Old Guo was trying to send the audience off to the afterlife. The whole place burst into laughter. Zhou You couldn't help laughing too—live banter had so much more engagement. Cracking melon seeds, sipping tea, listening to little tunes—this was the good life.
Old Guo said: "Listening to相声 has its benefits. It lifts your spirits and makes you laugh—that's something money can't buy." Teacher Yu agreed: "That's true." Old Guo continued: "You might spend five hundred bucks, sit here all night, laughing your head off for four or five hours—that five hundred is worth it." Teacher Yu said: "Worth it." Old Guo asked: "Can you laugh like that at home? You can't laugh at home." Teacher Yu wondered: "How would you laugh at home?" Old Guo said: "With that five hundred at home, can you laugh?" Teacher Yu replied: "Laugh at the money." Old Guo said: "After dinner, the whole family has nothing to do. Put five hundred on the table and say, 'Come on, let's laugh for a while.'" Teacher Yu exclaimed: "Hey! How would you laugh?" Old Guo said: "Can you laugh? You can't. If you really could, that sickness wouldn't be cured with five hundred."
Haha, Zhou You couldn't stop laughing. This was definitely better to watch now. Too bad everyone has a peak period. Catch as many shows as you can—it's never a loss. The audience heckling was especially fun. When they brought up Yu Qian's three hobbies, everyone shouted in unison: "Smoking, drinking, and perming his hair."
After two encores and a few short skits, it was over. Sun Li laughed even harder than Zhou You. He had seen a lot, so his threshold was higher, but this was her first real exposure. "I've never seen this before. I didn't expect it to be so explosive live." Zhou You said, "That's because Old Guo is here. Without him, there wouldn't be this many people." Later, more small theaters opened, but after the initial boom, the crowds thinned out. There was less innovation, and few had the talent to carry the torch. The eldest son saw this clearly and took the chance to move into film and TV. Old Guo extended the life of相声, but with no successors, it could only slowly decline.
After the show, Zhou You didn't rush off. He had arranged to meet Yu Qian afterward. Yu Qian knew how to have fun, crossing multiple circles: film, music, animal husbandry, and perm culture. Once the audience had all left, Yu Qian changed clothes backstage and came out front. "Mr. Zhou, right? So young and promising. When Director Teng told me, I was surprised—a famous film investor!" Yu Qian was polite on their first meeting.
Zhou You felt at ease seeing Yu Qian: "Teacher Yu, you've gotten me through many sleepless nights. I've come a few times before, but I was always busy. This time, I finally caught you." Yu Qian laughed: "Whoa, Mr. Zhou, you're scaring me. I sell my art, not my body." A professional相声 actor—most people couldn't keep up. Zhou You chuckled: "Haha, Teacher Yu is even funnier in real life. I know you love to have fun, and so do I. Could I visit your zoo? I'm really curious." He wanted to learn more through Yu Qian.
At that, Yu Qian's demeanor changed. He had been a bit formal, but now he felt like he'd found a kindred spirit: "Hearing you say that, I'm thrilled. Let's go tomorrow. I'm having a late-night snack with some friends tonight—want to join?" Truly a man of passion. Zhou You was delighted and looked at Sun Li: "Coming along?" She nodded.
The place was nearby, so the three of them walked instead of driving. Oh, Old Yu sure had a wide circle. The others weren't familiar, seemed like music industry types, but one he recognized: Wu Jing. So they'd known each other that long. As soon as they sat down, Yu Qian started introducing: "This is Zhou You, Mr. Zhou. He invested in *A Bite of China*, *Lost in Thailand*, *Love is Not Blind*, *Finding Mr. Right*—a famous investor." Everyone stood up and introduced themselves: this was from Black Panther Band, this was Wu Jing.
Zhou You shook hands with each: "I love having fun too. Investing is just playing. Lucky to meet Teacher Yu—we've arranged to visit his horse ranch tomorrow to broaden my horizons." Yu Qian beamed: "I love playing too. No wonder we hit it off right away. Don't call me Teacher Yu—just call me Old Yu or Qian Ge. And I won't call you Mr. Zhou." Zhou You said, "Fine, it's just a title. Call me by my name or Teacher Zhou—my day job is a university professor."
Wu Jing's eyes had been gleaming. He chimed in: "I can tell, Teacher Zhou, you look like you've trained. I wouldn't have guessed you're a teacher." Zhou You was surprised Wu Jing could tell—no wonder he'd trained in martial arts since childhood. "Brother Jing, sharp eyes. I just started learning Sanda a little over a year ago, for fitness." Zhou You didn't know the Black Panther Band members well, but he knew their famous name. He'd listened to *No Place to Hide* on repeat for who knows how long.
The whole table was full of fun-loving people, so the drinking naturally went all out.